3.24.2013

bittersweet memories

Grandpa K and Me
somewhere around the time of this story.
I recently moved into a new role at work. When I did, mom said: Too bad Grandpa K isn't here so you can tell him. And I told her, I know, I thought of that, too... 

When I graduated from college, I worked in retail for about 9 months while I looked for a job that I wanted. I figured, I have a job, so I can be a little picky.

So, when a friend introduced me to my first real "big girl" job after college at the company I am still at today, I was pretty pumped that I had found what I was looking for.

Grandpa was in the nursing home at the time. I went to visit him and told him all about it shortly after I started. He was so proud - you would have thought I had become the youngest CEO on the planet. But I hadn't - it was just a normal job, but one that I was excited about and that related to my degree. I remember that he asked me to write down my job title so that he could remember what it was. I did, and we put it in his top drawer so he would know where it was.

The next time I went to visit, people who worked at the nursing home were stopping me and telling me Congrats on your new job! and Your grandpa told me what a great job you got!  and Your grandpa is so proud of you! Apparently he had been pulling out the piece of paper with my job title on it and showing it to anyone who would look and listen. :)

A few months after I started, a job a step up opened and I moved into that role. I again told Grandpa, and he made sure to pull out the piece of paper from his drawer. We crossed out the old title and wrote the new one down and put it back in the drawer. And, again, he showed it to anyone who would look and listen.

Not too long after that, Grandpa passed away. Since then, I have moved into 3 new roles at my company and, each time, I think about how proud Grandpa would have been and wish he was here so I could update his little sheet of paper. And I'm proud to have had a Grandpa who loved me so much and wasn't afraid to share how proud he was.

2.10.2013

Be the change!

Tonight (well, technically last night since it's after midnight now), I went to see Revolution '63 performed by the Youth Performance Company (YPC) with friends.

The show is about - as it sounds - 1963, a time of revolution in the U.S. and key historical events. The assassination of JFK. A number of significant civil rights movements, including the March on Washington. A time of struggle and growth for women's rights. I even learned quite a few things.

The show was amazing and a bit of an emotional roller coaster.

The portrayal of the commitment by those who fought for the rights of all people during that time made me proud and inspired. The fact that such inequality existed made me disappointed and uncomfortable. An old clip of the news announcing that JFK had died pulled at my heart. And the recognition of those who sacrificed their freedom and their lives for the cause of equality and peace - and those injured or killed as innocent bystanders - well, I don't really have the words.

In addition to the storyline, I'm (again) in awe at the talent of the youth who perform in YPC performances. This organization and those who participate in it are truly wonderful and have done another great show with another great message. This time "Be the change!" Although there has been progress, there is still work to be done.

To say the least, I was moved and impressed. This show is still happening next weekend (Feb. 15-17) and I highly recommend you see it. It's only $12 and is worth much more. And, if you don't want to go alone, I'd go again. Just let me know!

Visit the Revolution '63 web page for more details.

And, if you're interested in seeing YPC's next show, Free to Be You and Me, I'll be going in May. And I'd love it if you'd join me.


12.12.2012

do better...

Last week, I submitted a Letter to the Editor for the first time. It was posted in the Caledonia Argus this week, but it wasn't posted in the online version, so I'm posting it here, too for anyone who wanted to see it but doesn't get a paper copy of the Argus. It was printed pretty much as I submitted, with a few small exceptions. 
  1. My subject line was: Extremely poor taste
  2. I addressed the author of the article - who is also the editor.
  3. I included a foot note and they did not.
A copy of what was printed is here and I pasted my original below. 
______________

Subject: Extremely poor taste
Dear Ms. Bialkowski,

I'm writing to express that the front page article in the Caledonia Argus (http://hometownargus.com/2012/11/29/man-found-deceased-in-car/) regarding the death of Brandon Werner was, in my opinion, inappropriate. While I agree that the newspaper can use its platform to have an impact covering sensitive topics, such as suicide, there was no need to tie it to Brandon in such a public way. Your article demonstrates an utter lack of regard for his grieving family and friends both through its general nature and by stealing the words that his family intended for his obituary and remembrance, awkwardly placing them in the middle of your article–not to mention using only bits and pieces that tell an incomplete story.

Yes, I also saw your other post about the "bold leap" you made in choosing to report on it (http://hometownargus.com/2012/12/04/raising-awareness/). You are correct–suicide is a serious and sensitive issue. Helping people to see the warning signs, when possible, and providing ways to get help are both important and a service to the community. So by all means, report on this serious issue and raise awareness... but do it in a tactful way. Also, I suggest you learn the difference between a "bold leap" and a "completely insensitive article."  You had so many other options in how to raise awareness about this issue and you chose the one that hurts members of the community you serve.

Yes, Yes. I also saw Larry Werner's article (http://hometownargus.com/2012/12/04/folks-have-a-lot-to-say-about-suicide-2/). It's a good article that raises awareness of the issues. Perhaps you could have included the tips for prevention with his article and “raised awareness” in a more appropriate way. If you read it carefully, you'll notice that those speaking out about specific individuals who committed suicide are the members of the families impacted directly and who chose to speak publicly, not the reporters or newspaper editors. And, I'm not sure if you missed this part, too?
Don Heinzman, a columnist and editorial writer for ECM, has been working with our company for years on policies related to the way we cover the news. Don has spent more years in this business than I have, is a member of our editorial board and our company’s board of directors. He sent along the ECM policy on suicide coverage and said he thinks it’s the best way to handle this difficult subject.

The policy reads, in part: “Reporting of suicides requires greater sensitivity than deaths due to other unnatural causes such as drowning or murder. Suicides should be reported when involving prominent public areas or public figures.” (Caledonia Argus - Dec. 4, 2012)

I'm not sure what part of this situation was in a "prominent public area" (“vehicle parked in a field") or reporting on a "public figure." So, in addition to tactless and insensitive, it would appear that your article does not align with the policy set forth by ECM, your parent publishing company.

I may no longer live in the Caledonia community, but I care about it, my family that lives there, and Brandon's family. I can't speak for them, but I can speak for myself–and I'm really disappointed.

Brenda Kruse
Maple Grove, MN

p.s. One big difference between us is that I gave Brandon’s family an opportunity to see this before sending it. They approved. Feel free to print it.

CC sent via hard copy to:
ECM Publishing, Inc.
Corporate Office
4095 Coon Rapids Blvd.
Coon Rapids, MN 55433